Getting Beaten by Orks - The 5 Stages of Greif

I wonder people are always so surprised when they get beaten by Orks? I feel as if every opponent goes through the traditional stages of greif.

Denial — Uh, let's re-count those victory points again.

Anger — This is BULL****! How is it that you get an AV14 vehicle for 90 points!??!?!? My ****ing Land Raider is 250 points! 250 ****ing points! This is BULL****!

Bargaining — Are you SURE you're right about those 18 shots your Dakkajets get? Let me see your rulebook.

Depression — I have over 8000 points of space marines. God help me.

Acceptance — Well, there's no way I'm winning this tournament now. Not with 8 battle points for the round. I may as well go have a few shots while we wait for the next one to start...

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How Did it Come to This? 10,000 Points of Painted Orks

One can only make so many milestone posts before people eventually get soul-crushingly bored of them. However, I'm going to make an exception here because with my Vengeance Batteries, I've reached a total of 10,000 points painted with my Orks. These points include reasonable upgrades, but not ridiculous add-ons like Kill Kannons for the Battlewagons. Let's not be silly . Here's a video of the army. Unlike the one I did for 7,000, this does not include a running commentary of each unit. I simply cannot find the time to do that. However, at the end of the post, please find a complete army list. Please try to view in YouTube instead of this embed because I uploaded it at full resolution and it took me forever. You won't be disappointed! I started playing this game in 2010 when some friends and I suddenly realized that we finally had grown-up jobs and could actually afford it. I'd always danced around the idea of collecting Orks either for F

Joke Armies - an Editorial

Ponies and Smurfs and Gundams! Oh my! Sometimes someone posts a joke army they've built and painted on the internet and the internet lashes out against it, sometimes quite vociferously. I have a problem with the strong objections to these armies, with caveats. Please note that, throughout this article, I will refer to armies which break the 4th wall and are incongruous to the 40k fluff as "joke armies". Of course, I do realize many hobbyists who choose to build their armies in this way do not mean them as a joke and take it very seriously, but I need some kind of general term for the article. Shannon's Smurf Drop Pod Army Hobbyist Reasoning The hobbyists who choose this kind of path for their army express four-ish common reasons for doing so, sometimes citing two or three of them simultaneously. Cost: Cost can be a big driver towards building this kind of army. A lot of the time, it's quite a bit cheaper to use toys to stand in for 40k models. An

Loopy Paints Unto Others - Space Marines (Brown)

I've completed another commission for Frontline Gaming. For this one, the customer chose a brown scheme using the Ravenwing iconography for a generic chapter or chapter of his own devising. This was a LEVEL 1 commission which means just one highlight. This was the first time I'd ever done Edge Highlighting which is the preferred method for doing this level of commission. I know it may seem strange that someone doing commission work hasn't done edge highlighting, but it's just not my preferred method. I prefer to wet blend everything or just do blocked highlights over darker colors and washes. The first go-around they looked terrible. I tried really hard to keep the edge highlights thin and vague, but instead they came out kind of sloppy. Because of that, I had to spend an additional 4 hours on making the highlight heavier and more pronounced. The good thing is, I know what I'm doing now and won't make the same mistake again; therefore an army lik

WAAGH! Drillteef

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